Memory of Light
by ArgentNoelle
Summary: Thor and Loki during the events of the movies.


I found these one word prompts here:

clubs/ writing/ answers/ show/ 421968/ need- 30- random- word- prompts- 30-day- writing- challenge- im- doing- help

And then I wrote them all at once while listening to the Thor soundtrack. Some of them are random. All but three of them are inspired by the movies, most of them are based on actual scenes.

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1. Secret

He wishes it didn't have to be this way. When he thought of this plan, he knew it was going to be hard—but looking into Thor's eyes, it is so much harder to convince himself that he doesn't care. He has been jealous of his brother for a long time, even going so far at one point that he tried to kill him. Well—there were mitigating circumstances. He tries to bring back the feelings of resentment and fury, but the hope with which Thor looks at him—even now—

"Come home," Thor says. For a moment they stare searchingly at each other, and Loki thinks Thor has seen it—the secret he is trying to hide, the fact that he wants nothing more desperately than to do so.

Then Loki smiles, the gesture painful. He wonders if it is as clear as it seems to him, the agony he feels inside. Or perhaps it is truly madness. He does not know, and part of him no longer cares. "I don't have one," he says, and watches the switch being thrown, a mask of coldness fall over his brother's face.

It is a lie—but then, he is the God of Lies. If he plays this right, he will find himself on his way to Asgard again, soon.

2. Blankets

The night is cold, and the sky above them strewn with stars. He watches them, aware of Jane next to him. As he'd told her of the great tree Yggdrasil and watched her eyes alight, he'd felt for a moment connected again to his home, but looking up at the sky now, with her asleep beside him, it is remote and beautiful, unreachable for him now that he is only a mortal. He will never be able to fly through the air again, to feel the lightning crackling around him.

3. Searching

As he fell through the cosmos, passing through miles and miles of emptiness, Loki waited for death, but it did not come. He saw the colors of the abyss around him and felt the chill—cold, and darkness, and yet still he couldn't die. Or wouldn't? If he stopped trying, he would soon be ended—but it was one thing to know, or even to wish—a hand slipping from a staff—so easily done—but to consciously stop himself from living, to cease to exist—he couldn't do it. Even now.

And yet there was nothing. Odin had acknowledged that Loki would never be good enough, _could_ never be.

4. Utopia

The world rises from the waves, clouds floating below it, like a sea—but the sea is there, and falls, endlessly, downwards. The spires are tall and golden, living embodiments of might, of right, of power—of everything Asgard has been and will ever be.

5. Textbooks

The book lies open to a page with a picture on it in full color—a man encircled by a serpent.

6. Light

It is the first light he has seen for a long time. A strange blue light that casts eerie shadows and makes the darkness, so long complete, seem darker in comparison. He looks—for the first time in so long, he _looks_—and sees the faces of monsters arrayed before him. Of course his saviors are monsters. The irony is dreadful, and he begins to laugh, turning into a cough as he doubles up on the snowy ground.

7. Crush

When he came into the building to show off how powerful he was, he did not anticipate being crushed by a large green monster.

8. Heat

When he steps through the portal, the first thing—the very first thing—that he notices is that everything is warm. He has been so cold, he had had stopped noticing, but now the heat assaults him from every direction. He savors it, for a moment—the blessed heat is the promise of freedom, and of retribution.

9. Memory

"We played together. We fought together. Do you remember none of that?"

"I remember a shadow. Living in the shadow of your greatness."

10. Sky

He stands above where his hammer has fallen, in the field—and unbidden, the memory comes of the other time he had stood above it—but then it was night, and the rain had been falling, mud churned up beneath it, and when he reached for the handle, so sure of himself—it had not come. Above him, the rain fell, endlessly, and he raged to the sky, and sunk into the ground, and everything was changed.

He clasps with his hand. This time, the hammer comes, and he jumps into the sky.

11. Galaxy

It is all before them, he says. They can go anywhere. Anywhere at all. Loki stares at galaxies spread before him, touches them with his finger, and he loathes himself for wanting more, even as he knows he is being used.

12. Second time

The city burns below him. _See_! But he cannot. This destruction is not wanton—it is all for a purpose, carefully calculated. He does not feel guilty. He has no reason to. Still—it is not truly his plan to destroy. Sometimes he fears he is forgetting where the mask of lies ends and his own purposes begin.

Thor. Still so trusting. Why?

His hands fumble for the dagger, and plunge it through armour, into unprotected flesh. It will hardly even wound—but perhaps he will learn to be more careful next time.

Next time, when he might truly be trying to kill.

13. Cookies

"Cookies?" Thor asks hopefully. Loki scowls. He is sitting on the window seat, and trying, once again, to free the bounds placed on his magic. "No. Go away."

14. Snacks

Give you a taste. The power of the staff is immeasurable, intoxicating—you know it is clouding your mind, pushing you more easily to anger—but the price is worth it.

15. Literature

You find yourself reading the myths, wondering how much is true. Now you know they are real—and until you can build a bridge into the heavens, you have no answers. The book is still there, tossed aside in a corner until one day when you sit down and find it wedged into the corner. In spite of yourself, you begin to flip through.

16. Clouds

The plane flies through the clouds, and you hear thunder.

17. Black and white

All at once, you know what to do. All at once, the choices are simple—there is purpose, undiluted and focused only on helping the alien. You don't know why, but you don't care. You'll do it because it's the right thing to do.

18. Possibilities

"Earth."

"Why?"

"I have a score to settle there."

"Very well."

"And you'll give it to me? Once we've taken it?"

"Of course. We said you could choose anything—though I wouldn't have guessed you'd pick that once."

19. Smudge

The broken bridge is the reminder of all that has happened. He goes there only once, but the image stays with him—the ice stopping abruptly, and the water pouring down into darkness. It is a reminder both of Jane and of Loki. It saddens him, but he still knows breaking the bridge was the right thing to do. He would do it again, if he had to—yet he wishes there had been another way.

20. Reasons

"Tell me!" he shouts, but hears nothing but excuses. Of course—this is the reason for everything. This is why. This. Because he had never been good enough. From the beginning, he had been lied to, because Odin _knew_.

21. Old

He has lived through hundreds of these mortals lifetimes, and yet here he is, sitting with one of them, confessing that, for the first time, he doesn't know what to do. It is an astonishing thought—a life as long as his changed so quickly, so suddenly and completely.

22. Clock

"Cookies?" Thor asks again. Loki sighs. "Thor. It's only been five minutes."

23. Stillness

Above them, the army falls—the great serpent-like beasts falling, limp, to the ground, crashing and burning. For a moment, everything stops—staring at the hole in the sky, as it begins to close.

24. Happy

We've won. We've saved the Earth, we've saved New York City, we've saved the innocent people.

_Yes._ Loki answers silently. _But I have won as well._

25. Time

Loki doesn't remember when the admiration with which he looked at his brother started turning to resentment. It must have happened sometime, but he is unable to pinpoint quite when, quite how. It wasn't any single event, but rather a thousand slights—_none of them imagined_—all ignored. It was not Thor's fault. That was just the way he was. It was always so. Loki soon learned that he would never live up to his brother's example. The presence of Thor was a bright sun, directing all attention to him and no one else.

(For once, _he_ wants to be the one noticed. If he has to take over a world to do it.)

26. Children

It was, perhaps, a premonition. Staring, for the first time, around the Weapons Vault. But if it was they did not know it. Their faces were full of shared mischief, and without a word, they ran to catch up. If they had lingered…

But they did not.

27. Lamps

Asgard has torches. Their reflections multiply over the metal walls. What shadows there are is hard to notice, broken up into pieces around them.

28. Reflection

The first thought that many had, seeing the two young princes, was that they seemed perfect opposites of one another. While Thor was boisterous, energetic, and loud, his brother was quiet, thoughtful, and softspoken. They seemed as though they should not get along—and yet, they could most often be found together. Heads bent around a shared secret, eyes bright.

29. Pillow

"Pillow?" Thor asked. Loki groaned again. "Why do you keep bothering me?" he asked.

"I just want you to be happy."

30. Clothing

He strode out the doors, his armour shimmering into being around him. In the panic of the crowd, he was paid no heed, but he had caused the chaos—and in that knowledge, he could revel.

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End file.
